It’s been a year since I’ve weighed myself. Yep…an entire year.

You may recall an article I wrote last summer about weighing frequency, which went into detail about what the current literature supports for appropriate weighing frequency; including the physiological and psychological effects. At the end of that article I vowed not to weigh myself for an entire year in hopes of finding out what really makes me who I am (which is WAY more than just a number on the scale). I bet you’re curious to know how much I weigh now, right?

A few days ago I thought to myself, today’s the day. I’m going to step on that scale. As I was walking towards it, I started thinking about all the lessons I’ve learned by NOT weighing myself. Here are my top three “ah hah” moments:

1. I am more than a number (duh!) and if I do want to identify myself with a number, it’s going to be one that improves my self-image…like my low resting pulse or low blood pressure.
2. I really like to exercise and eat right. Well actually, I love it.  I realized that I don’t exercise because I need to see a certain number on the scale. And here’s the biggest shocker…my body looks exactly the same as it did a year ago. My clothes fit the same. I feel beautiful.
3. I’m much more accepting of my lifestyle choices. Without a silly number to cause me anxiety, I no longer stress over indulging. Rather, I compensate by “getting back on the wagon” and eating healthy again.

Still want to know how much I weigh?

About a month ago, my world was flipped upside down. My reality was not reality. My heart hurt. I questioned everything, including my self-worth. I had never felt more unworthy of love. I had never felt so unbeautiful. And as I was about to step on the scale, I thought to myself: “What the hell am I doing?”.  In what seemed like hours (but was really only a few seconds) I thought of all the good things that I AM, things that can’t be determined by a scale.

I am a daughter, a sister, an aunt.

I am a mentor and an educator.

I am a best friend and parent (to my furry kids of course).

I am a lover. A forgiver. A partner for life.

You’ve probably guessed this by now, but I never stepped on that scale and honestly, I don’t know if I ever will again. So the next time you step on the scale (or are contemplating stepping on a scale), think of all the things you ARE. Those things are what truly make you who you are. NOT a number on the scale.

~KW